the phone rings
and it is the detective
from Bragg County
telling me there will be
no trial
that Ethan has agreed to a plea
so in exchange for
his admission of guilt
in my rape and one other
he will be sentenced to eight years
of which he will likely only serve four or five

but even though this seems small
I think only of the golden boy image
forever tarnished
a record of his wrongs
in permanent ink
no soccer scholarships
or easy victims that can be charmed
by his innocent good looks

Ethan can no longer
follow me anywhere