it is Thursday before I figure out that I actually think best
while I am moving
and my muscles are warm
so it is while I am stretching
in one corner of the gym
that I get this
amazing thought
amazing enough that I know it is probably not my thought at all

so I’m there, stretching out my sore back
convinced that will fix the problem
and I think that maybe there is someone
who doesn’t want me to get things right with God
someone who actually likes the fact that I’m freaking out
about Ethan
and not talking to God
and drifting farther away
day by day

while I realize that satan is actually in the Bible
I’ve never really considered that he was really real
and it is this strange thought that propels me
when I get home
to look him up in my
takes-me-an-hour-to-locate
Bible
and realize that
perhaps this strange thought
is actually true*

* 1 Peter 5:8 – “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”