Ben calls at precisely 9:00pm and I curl
up under the covers and tell him
how my dad is starting a new family

he listens and says nice things.

and it dawns on me that all night
he is the only one I wanted to talk to

so when he asks if he can come on
Saturday I tell him to come to the gym
and that I’m glad he’s coming.

And long after we say good-bye
I lay still thinking
why him?
why now?

I’ve been quite happy to live a single life
with no attachments other than
punching a card at the gym.

I’ve always liked it that way.

Ben is unexplored territory
a detour
maybe a distraction

yet as I think about how Gabby’s hand
hovered protectively over her stomach
maybe that is exactly what I need.